Kid Shield

Worship.

It seems to me that one of the biggest differences between Christian denominations is the style of worship.

When I attend a new church [to me], I look closely at the core beliefs of the congregation. If I detect any deviations from scripture, I am immediately suspicious. Actually, not just suspicious - I typically reject the premise of the entire church outright.

If the assembly has survived this purely subjective but thoughtful test of merit, I try to keep an open mind to the musical portion of worship. Typically I find that in large churches, the music is pretty good. You might have found the same as I in small churches: there is perhaps one person with some musical talent and several others who don't have much talent at all. Since I regularly listen to Air 1, KLove, The Effect Radio, and M88 , and I haven't yet answered God's calling for me to music, I don't find myself too critical.

What I do find extremely strange is my social response. I'm talking about the anxiety I feel when I might be doing or not doing something that I think somebody else may think I should be doing/not doing. In any given setting, there may be people standing, sitting, clapping, not clapping, swaying, bobbing, tapping, raising arms, or one arm, or two hands slightly uplifted, with them facing outward, or upward, or arms folded, or hands resting firmly on the back of the chair in front, and eyes open or closed but not winking. I've seen people dancing, and heard people singing off key or speaking in tongues. My social response? I am happy to participate in all of these things, just as long as I don't feel uncomfortable.

Of course that is absolutely ridiculous. The unblemished live wire between me and God, the blood of Jesus Christ my Savior, should so overwhelm me that I would care less about the thoughts (regarding me) of people around me. Yet I care, and I'm not happy about it. I think I can thank American culture for my social programming of conformity. Or perhaps it is human nature or just my personality. I admire my best friend for singing slightly off-key at the top of his lungs during worship. I don't even know what's going on between him and God, I just like that he doesn't seem to care what somebody might think of him.

In lieu of a healthier spirit of worship, God has given me children. It seems this spiritual disability of mine is quickly remedied by the presence of a 20lb human sponge who's fragile existence has been entrusted to me. Powered by fatherhood, I can sway, lift an arm (but not both hands raising Pineapple heavenward - that would be crossing the line, plus my wife would be overly concerned about a likely squirm but improbable 8-foot fall), and sing quite nearly at the top of my lungs in the prayer that my little girls will one day freely and fiercely worship the Almighty.

I admit, the kid shield is a cure for the symptoms, not for the illness. But I am thankful.